Dead Dog Dance - 5/11/08

The off field issues sorted for the Dog, their attention returned to the green and with it their full rotation of starting players. Lead Off Linda opening the batting with Davy Mac and Andy Zee filling the turn table middle order, it was left to Dead Dog Dandy to place a firm hand on the rear of the team and squeeze his bowls in when tight situations presented. Meatloaf on the airways, DDD could not help but be inspired while the fat sweaty love of his life, serenaded him into a mood for destruction. (well you were licking your lips as your lipstick shined, and I was dying just to ask for ACE!!)

The dead dogs sought to pick up where they let off the week before and with a picket fence of 1's on the scoreboard early they stretched their lead with every end. The full force of the dog was present and every member of the crowd felt their intentions early. With a few more ends adding to their total the dog sought to attack the jugular and finish off its prey quick and painlessly. LOL at her stirling best, placed no less than 4 bowls withing a parrots pecker of the kitty throughout the night and in the 6th this remarkable lead off, helped Davy Mac and Andy Zee put the helpless prey to the sword with 4 more making for the 6 end an a strangle hold on the match.

Not many words can describe the performance of their opposition, to be frank, it seamed they failed to even turn up for the evening, and the Dogs were left to frolic on the green, turning negatives of 1 or 2 into positive scores. As the night wore on another end of 6 was added to the total and with that a firm chance of securing the 6 pack for the first time this season. A few strategic changes by Davy mac altering his Skylark bowls for the favoured grasshoppers of DDD, unbeknown to himself, added intrigue to the evening, and possibly the most interesting was the end Davy Mac could not decide for either and went for 1 of each. So Skylarking with the Grasshoppers it was, but the professionalism and grace of DDD shone through as in the back 6 ends, not much could waiver his steady hand.

The evening wound down and with such an insurmountable lead, there remaind only 2 things to be decided, who won the coverted 6 pack and if the dogs could pants the opposition.

I would not put them on a Frog,
I would not put them on a log,
I would not, could not, on a train,
nor in a house or in the rain,
I would not, could not, Pants our foes,
I would not Pants them to their toes.

So as DDD sung his little tune, the dogs stepped up to the 11th end and with raffle prizes on the mind and a 6 pack waiting in the wings, the Dog faltered. Like a predator letting they prey have one final breath of life, like a prisoners last cigarette, like Ace von Bertouch giving just a hint of whats below his sarong, to a dying man.......and the chance was gone...... be it only by 1.

The last off the green, the Dogs were looked at with frustration by the club house, one brave soul vetured a comment 'take your time did you' which DDD replied, 'A masterpiece takes time, do you think Michaelangelo finished the Sistine Chapel quickly just for a chance at the International Roast?'

You would think 15 would be enough to secure the 6 pack, maybe even 20..... the Dog did not stop there and piled on an impressive margin of 24 (25-1) But the crulest twist of fate was yet to come for a night that will go down in the Dog Record books, 24 would not be enough and it was the Fud Puckers who with 28 took the pale ale.

Dogslow Votes
3 - LOL easily the best lead off batter of any side
2 - Andy Zee, had a nice litte patch in the middle to snuff out the oppositions hopes of a score
1 - DDD (only because Davy Mac bowled 2 with the wrong bias)